Morning Constitutional – Wednesday, 25 August 2010

Good morning, folks. Unfrozen Caveman Center-Fielder will stay in Detroit. Now, your morning constitutional:

John McCain fends off a challenge from the right, Ben \”Obama\’s the Worst President Ever\” Quayle wins his crowded primary, and Lisa Murkowski might need to find a new job. Also, nobody\’s quite sure what happened in Vermont.

Jimmy Carter is in North Korea on a mission to secure the release of an American prisoner and, quite possibly, break an impasse in U.S.-North Korean relations.

The Mexican Navy has discovered 72 dead bodies on a ranch in Tamaulipas, the largest discovery of dead bodies in Mexico\’s four year war on organized crime.

Where ideology means a failure at self-preservation.

After this weekend\’s election in Australia, where no party won a direct majority, every country with the \”Westminster Model,\” a form of government that historically produces strong majorities, now has a hung parliament.

What John Boehner offers in lieu of an economic plan.

How did the Minerals Management Service become such a failure of a regulatory agency?

Management is SO 20th century.

Job losses that were expected during the ban on off-shore drilling didn\’t happen.

Drink water to lose weight.

Man unaware he had been shot in the head with a .22 five years ago at at a New Year\’s party because he was drunk.

Finally, the price of bacon has soared 200% since a year ago.